I spend a lot of my time doing stuff that helps me earn a living. I also spend a lot of my time playing video games and trying my best to beat inane, meaningless achievements in them so I can feel momentarily awesome and useful. Sonic the Hedgehog has been my latest quest, and I must say that as of yesterday, at 3:45 in the morning, I destroyed that game...
Well, I got all of the Xbox live arcade achievements for it, that is. Yes, a wonderful childhood game of mine was put up for sale and I got it, happily eager to relive my joyous childhood. Needless to say, after about twenty minutes of it, the game soured and poisoned everything I held dear to that game. Yes, I understand that to make the game more profitable/marketable you need to add these dumb "achievements" in there, but did you really have to make them for this game? Come on, guys.
Because this is the unbearable brutality you make us - the gamers who have these weird, OCD-esque qualities about our achievement scoring - do. You force us to perform, like a circus monkey, ridiculous things that the original programmers of the game never would have imagined us doing. Who really needs to beat Sonic the Hedgehog in under forty minutes? Really?
But it doesn't matter, because I earned my 200 gamerscore and can now rest easy. Except that Xbox just likes to shit over all of these "perfect score" gamers and makes it so that as soon as you take a step in a video game you get an achievement so now you can't erase the game from your history and are FORCED to play such putrid games such as Fairytale Fights six times to get all of the achievements because your nephews came over one day and played Xbox when you were gone and brought their game to play and used your gamertag to play it...
But, whatever, I'm not bitter.
No comments:
Post a Comment